Heaven Be A Xanax by Morgan Parker

Heaven Be A Xanax
Morgan Parker

When people say how are you
I say good
It is a rule no one can answer
Crying in The Gap by my therapist’s office
or I am still angry with my parents
for traumatizing me
through organized sports
Dangerous and satisfying body of water
I can almost remember heaven
or Still a woman slaughtered for wonder
or Unfortunately misplaced grip
I am not doing a good job waiting
When I get to heaven I’m going
to wear my good bra
so no one can stay mad at me
I won’t have any feelings to hurt just
cheeseburgers on cheeseburgers on
deep colored slumber
Just men offering their golden bodies
And I will take the offering on my tongue
And it will not be a vault
And someone will not invade me
And I will kneel to pray
And I will address the prayer to myself
And I will be allowed

MARGINALIA

1.
Day 24 of The Sealey Challenge. Today’s offering is There Are More Beautiful Things Than Beyoncé by Morgan Parker.

2.
I’ve learned so much from reading this powerful work. At the heart of it, this book urges us to consider how we all participate in the narratives that shape our understanding of race and gender. Beyoncé as a cultural icon serves as a fulcrum of this collection—not just as the pop star we all know, but as a complex symbol of power and vulnerability.

3.
The poet examines the shared experiences of many Black women who are seen but not truly known or understood. There is also a weaving of the stories of various influential Black figures, such as Billie Holiday and Nina Simone, who, like Beyoncé, have navigated the duality of being celebrated and marginalised. There is a tension between the visibility that comes with success and the erasure that often accompanies it—how Black women are both perceived and yet, in many ways, invisible in the broader cultural narrative.

4.
I identify strongly with how the poet speaks about how women’s bodies are policed, objectified, and commodified while also asserting their autonomy and agency. The poems do not offer easy solutions; instead, they hold up a mirror to society, forcing us to confront the realities of racism, sexism, and the intersection of both.

5.
Yet, amidst all this, there is also a celebration of the multifaceted nature of Black womanhood—its beauty, strength, and complexity. The collection asks: How do you navigate a world that constantly demands your excellence but denies you the space to be human?